The Queen, so sad at the thought of relinquishing her throne

Once upon a time there was a girl who had known a good life for most of her life. Not to say there weren't rough spots, but for the most part she'd been pretty lucky and privileged. Upon graduating from college she married her dream cowboy and they settled in a cute little house that had been divided into 3 apartments. The bedroom and the living room were downstairs and the front door, kitchen and bathroom were upstairs. Yes, a little strange, but with her own flair she made it fit her and her husband's new life, despite the bathroom door being between the fridge and the stove. After a little over two years living in the housement (house/apartment/basement) her husband came home one day and said he'd found a new place to live, that it was very nice and right down the road from where he worked and much closer to where she worked. So taking him at his word she said OK and they decided to leave their cute little housement and it's severe no ventilation mold problem and moved on to something that, to her, was sight unseen, but had untold promise according to her husband. (Below is the housement.)

The new place was a single-wide trailer on the corner of a wheat field. Now living in a trailer house was not something she'd ever thought she'd do, but it didn't have tires on the roof, and in fact it was quite a lovely trailer as far as trailers go. It was pretty new and had been completely remodeled so the inside didn't even look like a trailer anymore. Life was good. They had their own place (albeit rented space), their own yard and they didn't have to hear the neighbors play video games all night, flush the toilet or a myriad of other noises no one should have to hear and guess what their neighbors were doing. They were content and she soon gladly accepted the title 'queen of the single-wide trailer'. Plus, they both loved being out of the city and on the corner of a wheat field. Alas, life was too good to last.

After about six weeks of bliss on the corner of the wheat field, the queen returned home from her dream job and there was a gentleman sitting in his car in the driveway. As she got out of her car the gentleman greeted her and said he was from Such-and-Such Bank and that the trailer was being repossessed. Lesson to everyone here is: Do NOT live in anything with wheels that can be towed away. But as this was happening the queen was thinking, 'WHAT? I signed a lease agreement. I pay my rent faithfully, seriously?!' Then she proceeded to explain to the gentlemen that she is merely renting this trailer from Mr. Landlord and shouldn't Mr. Landlord be the one discussing this? The banker informed her that Mr. Landlord does NOT in fact own the trailer, but the bank does. Hmmm. . . well what do you say to that? The queen and her cowboy were given two days to get all their worldly possessions out of home and find a new place to live. It was a sad day when Sea-foam (what the queen had dubbed their home due to it's color) was seen rolling down the road behind a semi, leaving a hole in the fence and tire tracks in the lawn. Again, it is NEVER recommended to live in anything with wheels.

If you've ever been shopping for a rental you know nice ones are hard to come by, especially when you only have two days until you are out on the street living in your car. After a few discussions with Mr. Landlord about the whole fiasco and why it all had happened (something that to this day the queen is not real clear on), Mr. Landlord apologized profusely and offered to let the queen and her cowboy live in his camp trailer while he bought a new single wide trailer to put on the corner of the wheat field. Without much option, the queen and her husband agreed to living in the camp trailer and put all their things in the shed behind their now long gone home and a snowmobile trailer. This camp trailer arrangement was to be only two weeks, but it stretched on and on to about eight weeks. Figuring on the two week time frame, all but two weeks of clothes and very minimal cooking utensils were buried deep within the snowmobile trailer. Now camp trailers do not have much storage space for anything, let alone food, and as mentioned cooking utensils were all but nonexistent so the queen (who cooks and eats relatively nutritiously most of the time) and her husband lived off frozen corn dogs, Ramen and cereal for eight weeks. Her diet in college wasn't even close to being that bad! YUCK!! To add insult to injury while living on corn dogs in a camp trailer whose shower was too small to wash your hair without whacking your funny bone on the wall, the queen wrecked her beloved Mariah, her cute, little, gold Honda Accord car. Life was looking kind of bleak, but THEN . . . Mr. Landlord said he found a 'new' trailer ( notice the qoutes around new) to fill the whole in the fence the trailer house had left behind. (Yes, the queen and her cowboy were living in a camp trailer in the driveway of a yard with a gaping hole in the fence where a trailer house used to stand. Classy! I know!!!) Delighted at the prospect of no more camp trailer nights with the probability of propane running out and freezing to death the queen and her cowboy went to look at the 'new' trailer before it was moved onto the corner of the wheat field. 'New' is in qoutes for a reason. It was nowhere near new - we're talking the stereotypical cat-lady-of-Kansas trailer (and her cowboy actually lived in Kansas for awhile so he really knew what he was talking about). The flooring was beyond disgusting, the cabinets were falling off the walls and the stove had dirty pots in the bottom drawer. Mr. Landlord knowing there was no comparison to the old trailer house explained he couldn't afford to buy a brand new trailer, but he could gut this and fix it up to look just like new. Again without better option, the queen and her cowboy agreed. However, Mr. Landlord had a pretty full schedule and remodeling cat-lady-of-Kansas trailer house wasn't that high on his priority list, even though the queen and her cowboy were freezing their hinnies off every night in the camp trailer.

The queen being the go-getter, take action kind of girl that she is and her husband the hard working, cowboy, handyman went to work and took the project on themselves with the agreement that Mr. Landlord would pay for the materials, appliances and their time. So the queen and her cowboy became the midnight construction crew. After work each night they'd paint, hang new cabinets, put new trim in and so forth until truly it was like new (almost) and livable. After lots of late nights, a hole being drilled in her cowboy's hand and quite a few oopsies they moved in with one bathtub still full of tile supplies, but there was another shower that wasn't made for midgets to use. HALLELUJAH!

It's been four years since that 'blessed' experience and the queen and her cowboy quite love their little home. There was a lot of blood, sweat and tears (literally) poured into that little place, and boy, they sure learned a lot doing it. It was pretty nice to make home improvement mistakes on someone else's dime. Now they know what NOT to do on their own home that they are searching diligently for this instant.

As exciting as moving on is, the queen will be very sad to relinquish her throne. Despite the rocky beginning there are many good memories in the little trailer and she LOVES living on her corner of the wheat field!

(This story is purely fiction and any similarities to persons living or dead are purely coincidental.) OK - just kidding. I'm the queen and this is the story of how I ended up where I am today. Sorry again, didn't have time to think through and formulate an educated, thought provoking, insightful post, so here you have it. :)